How to survive the summer holidays
There is so much excitement leading up to the start of the summer holidays but there is also the looming fear of how am I going to cope: different routines, kids clubs to organise, holidays to plan and prep for and the added guilt of how can I balance home life, work life and make this fun and memorable!
For a start take a break and be kind to yourself -Manage your expectations
Children often need a break too, allowing them to have some down time is often what they need most. Not every day needs to be planned out with new experiences and more stimulation. Often doing too much in the day is exhausting, leading to challenging behavior from your children and personal burn out. This is not sustainable and can have a negative impact on stress levels.
Instead have a couple of goals for the week: get into nature, see friends we haven’t connected with for a while and find time to laugh and play. Then plan a couple of things that can support you in achieving this.
Don't make comparisons to social media
We all know that social media isn’t reality, no one's house is always tidy, no mum or dad always sets our stimulating activities for their children. We all know that you can spend 45 minutes planning an activity that lasts 5 minutes. This is soul destroying. Instead take ideas from social media and choose things that lean into your child's interests for quick wins. But there is no harm in allowing your children to be bored and find their own fun. There is research to suggest it sparks creativity.
Reach out to friends and family
If you have local friends or family, reach out to them if you need a break. Normally parents are more than happy to swap play dates to gain a bit of down time. Sometimes buddying up for a day can break the cycle of childcare and help give you the boost you need.
Feeling stressed?
If you are feeling stressed out then spend some time listening to what you need. Ask yourself:
Why am I stressed?
What do I need to cope with this?
What can I do or who can I reach out to for help?
Stress is a signal for our brain that we’re in a moment of crisis. This signal releases adrenaline and cortisol, speeds up our heart rate and breathing and we go into the fight, flight or freeze response. This is helpful when we are in danger, but not so helpful if we are just feeling overwhelmed.
When we’re stressed we need to complete the cycle with the calming down phase in order to send the message to our brains that the moment of crisis has passed. Stress is supposed to be a short term response and can really affect our quality of life when it’s over a long period.
Here are some techniques to help you achieve this:
3 Minute Mindfulness- to help ground you in the moment
Relax in 60 Seconds - To help activate the parasympathetic nervous system, telling the body to rest and digest.
Breathe - lengthening your exhale helps inform the body that you are no longer in danger activating the parasympathetic nervous system
Get into nature - Lots of research suggests that but connecting with nature helps reduce the stress response and improve mood. Equally by going on a walk and looking into the sky and trees you are exercising which is great at combatting stress and releasing endorphins to make you happy. This is also a great way to model to your young people the importance of connecting to nature and looking after themselves.
Make time for you!
Notice when you start to zone out. This might involve mindless scrolling through social media or just getting irritable about things that you normally let go. Slow down and once again think about what your mind and body needs.
Allow yourself to have a moment to reset by taking yourself off for a walk around the garden, put on a film and give yourself the time to have a doze or a cup of tea. Prioritize your needs and be honest with yourself about what makes you feel good. Speak with your partner or family about what they could do or, when they can take over so you can catch up on emails or go for a run.
When you are looking after yourself you are in a far better position to look after others so connect with yourself and listen out for your needs. If this is something that you are struggling with and/or you feel like you would like a bit of help or support over the summer then please reach out to either myself or Sian . You are not on your own.