Ways to develop and cultivate resilience

Resilience is your capacity to adapt in the face of challenging circumstances, whilst maintaining a stable mental wellbeing. It’s the ability to stay present with discomfort of stress without it overwhelming you. 

It involves a strong focus on how we interpret events. It relates to our attitudes and beliefs that are helping, harming, or hindering our ability to cope with difficult times and challenging events.

Some examples of how to foster resilience and what resilience can look like includes:

• Imitating resilient role models - fake it till you make it
  Mirroring and adopting resilient behaviour in those we admire can inspire our resilience.

• Social support - feeling able to reach out whenever you need to.
  Resilience is reliant not solely on the individual, but also on having an entire support network.

• Increasing cognitive and emotional flexibility - perfectionism is the opposite of this.
  Resilient people tend to be flexible in how they think about challenges and their reaction to stress.

• Finding meaning, purpose, and growth - hindsight is really useful for this one.
  There are many examples of individuals who have remained resilient in the face of extreme hardship, relying heavily on the meaning they attach to their lives.

• Fostering optimism - being open to possibility of solutions.
  Realistic optimism is an important factor in remaining resilient.

While far from exhaustive, the list begins to suggest the wide range of factors involved in building and maintaining resilience and its impact on our lives.

There are resources you can turn to when you feel the need to strengthen your reliance and these can include:

• Recalling the good feelings gained from a relationship, experience or even a holiday - These sensations can act as an emotional anchor helping us though harder times.

• Somatic resources - practices / techniques / movement / breathing / body scans to ground the body (I have included a download you can listen to)

• Psychological resources - talk therapy, psychological models, techniques eg. counting backwards, remembering moments in life where you felt calm

• Environmental resources - changing or choosing your environment to support you. 

Eg. look out the window, go for a walk, taking some space

• Emotional resources - talking to a friend or close person who you can share with

Or listening to music/ watching something that evokes a desired emotional response.

Opposite Eg. feeling really sad might choose a comedy

Or if you’ve been avoiding an emotion - choosing something to watch or listen to that encourages you to lean into it

• Lifestyle resources - staying hydrated, rested, exercised, well nourished, choosing healthy habits

• Treat resources - stuff that makes you feel good in the moment eg. wine, dessert, chocolate

• Self help/ self care resources - journaling and self help books and podcasts

If you would like more strategies and support feel free to book a confidential coaching call.