What to do when your confidence has taken a knock

I recently spoke to Simon Gibson CEO of Spirant Group Services on his new podcast Success Won’t Come Calling and we talked about how Covid and the challenges it has brought may have knocked a person’s confidence.

If you feel that your confidence is low then I hope some of the points below will help.

Acknowledge your real feelings

We can often think to make progress we should bypass experiencing any ‘negative’ feelings and we should jump to being positive. What I’ve learnt from being a therapist for 10 years and seeing thousands of clients that this is not the case. Allow yourself to feel what is coming up, this isn’t a hippy-dippy thing to do. Grief, sadness, anger are all very natural emotions. Create some space to experience how you feel fully and they will naturally pass. This might look like writing your thoughts down, speaking to someone objective, going for walks, mindful activity like meditation, yoga, gardening, crafts, art.

Inspiring examples

Find stories of people you relate to overcoming their challenges. This can inspire us on an unconscious level to believe that this is possible for us. The podcast I mentioned has guests for all types of industries and backgrounds who talk about the mindset that has helped them, I think this would be a great resource if you want a boost of ideas.

The Obstacle is The Way

This is a great book on stoicism by Ryan Holliday. It outlines that not only can we learn value lessons from challenges but we can actually be better for it. This is can be hard to get your head around, depending on what particular challenge you’ve had. But it can be useful to see the opportunity in any adversity, no matter how small. This is part of having a growth mindset, rather than a victim mindset. The latter is a normal part of coming to terms with adversity but it’s not helpful if we stay stuck in victim mode.

Connect to your why

Sometimes we get in our own way. Putting things off and avoiding getting out of our comfort zone are too easy to do if it’s just ourselves who might suffer. When we connect to a bigger reason than ourselves then it gives us less option to avoid things: it can help us take leaps that might feel scary but are ultimately what we need to do to grow. With having my own business I regularly have to say yes to opportunites that challenge me and take me out of my comfort zone. I’m in the practice now of realising that’s where the magic is for me. I’m passionate about sharing my knowledge and experience of what has helped me to find freedom from depression and anxiety. So, what’s the reason why you get out of bed in the morning? Or what could it be? It is your loved ones, a cause or an injustice that you’re passionate about?

You’re not alone

If you’d like to talk through any of the points I’ve shared here, please contact me. You can book in direct here or complete the form below.